My Existence...

Dear Jesus, I come to you now with a broken heart and a weary spirit. I don't know how I can carry on each day knowing that a part of me had already gone, never ever to return. Can I ever be complete again? Can I ever smile again at the coming of a new day? Day after day I miss him more and more. Day after day my longing grows but it can never be fulfilled. How can I possibly live my life again? How do I overcome this feeling that I am now all alone and I shall always be alone or the rest of my life? How do I let go? The places we’ve been to, the celebrations we had together, they will never be the same. The emptiness in my heart is so big I can no longer breathe sometimes.

Help me O God! The pain of separation seems more painful to me than death itself. I don’t know how much longer I can carry on. Help me carry on this day Lord. Help me to let go, I pray. Though I may not forget, help me to remember how you have always carried me through. Though the pain may not yet go away, assist me in carrying this cross with hope in my heart.

Let me not forget the people who love me and assist me in this hour of need. May I find strength in them, consolation in the generosity of their hearts. And whenever I’m afraid, let there always be a hand to hold on to, a smile to brighten up my path. Send down your angels Lord and may I recognize your hand upon your every gift and blessing. Give me something to do that I may not feel useless, yet teach me also to rest knowing all will be well after the long dark night.

You are my Rock and my Provider, Savior and Defender, Friend and Lover who will never ever let me down. You will lead me through this day. You will fill my every hour with peace, my every moment with thoughts of your love. I cannot bear the burdens of tomorrow but I will offer you all that I have today. Today is yours O God. This moment is yours. Embrace me and take my hand. I am in your heart. I am safe. I am loved.